Happy Holidays

I’ve made no secret over the years how I feel about the Christmas season. There is a layer of stress involved that stretches months before you finally sit down to open gifts. I remember my grandfather, never much of a drinker, enjoying a few sips of cherry brandy Christmas morning. If ever there was going to be a time for drinking, that was it, and I completely get it. My slow and steady transformation into my grandfather is more apparent every passing year.

The financial burden is obvious, and not worth delving further into, since so many people stress over the lack of funds available to keep up with the Joneses. It comes off a little disingenuous to complain about spending too much money. Besides, we put the burden on ourselves. We raise our children’s expectations to the point we’re committed to debt over financing an hour or so of frantic paper tearing.

There is so much waste—paper, tissue, ribbons and bows. If you go the environmental route, it feels a little less authentic. But adding all the whistles and bells to any given present inflates its overall cost. Not to mention the insufferable process of wrapping itself, since most gifts aren’t conveniently square. Tape, dull scissors, little bits of scraps that are almost impossible to sweep up. Where’s that cherry brandy…

Some people get two weeks off. Politicians often get upwards of a month off, which is not a great look, honestly. University students still work underpaying jobs, and are often guilted into working either Christmas Eve or New Years Eve, or both. Some get very basic days off and have to work in between. And emergency personnel often have to work on the holidays themselves. Some work away. Children of divorced or separated parents need to work out schedules that most of their respective families have to work around. Some people like to visit friends and family. Others like it when people visit them. Some people prefer solitude, whether for reflection, mourning, or just a rare opportunity for true silence. We always hear more clearly when it’s quiet, anyway.

The variables around Christmas season are staggering when you start to list them out like this. I’m a fairly pragmatic person, and as such, I always assess things based on cost versus benefit. The cost, as is plain to see, is tremendous. Even the most astute planners incur high costs, whether it’s in gift-giving, meal planning, gas for travel, or simply time off from work. We all get that.

It's the benefit that’s supposed to “make it all worth it”. And you know, it’s cliché to say it, but seeing the joy in your children’s faces on Christmas morning goes a long way toward recuperating any financial setbacks. And if you don’t have kids, hopefully you find that same joy in your loved ones, your friends or neighbours, your colleagues, or in the memories of people you mourn.

The older I get, the more attuned I am to all these variables. We all approach the Christmas season in our own way, and it’s not always a joyous occasion. I have suffered personal losses on December 24^th, and it is very hard to feel festive when things like this happen. As someone who struggles with anxiety, I have to take deep breaths and remind myself that these things are really insignificant in the big picture.

All of this to get to my actual point.

There is nothing around the holiday season that annoys me more than when people complain about some imagined “War on Christmas”. It’s manifested in many ways:
 

• Some get really upset over people saying “Happy Holidays” instead of “Merry Christmas”. For those new here, let’s go over some very basic facts: Christmas, Boxing Day, and New Year’s Day are holidays—plural. Some people celebrate Winter Solstice. Hannukah takes place over several days around this time. There are many faith communities that celebrate in late December and early January. “Happy Holidays” is a convenient way to offer good tidings to everyone, regardless of their traditions.
• Besides, hasn’t “Seasons Greetings” always been acceptable to say? I fail to see the difference between that and “Happy Holidays”. Maybe some people would rather be told to go pound sand.
• Some self-righteous and self-proclaimed etymologists also get all upset about spelling Christmas “Xmas”. They feel that by using “X” you’re somehow removing the “Christ” from “Christmas”. Little do they know that the letter X is a Greek letter called “chi” (pronounced k-eye), and it was literally the first letter in “Christos”. So, Xmas and Christmas are literally one and the same. If you want to write Christmas out long-form, go ahead. But raging about someone (like me) who abbreviates it routinely is just nonsensical.
• Last time I checked, at least in Canada and the United States, Christmas is still recognized as a federal holiday, in which people are granted time off to observe as they choose—and even those who are not Christians receive this time off, too. Their holy days may not overlap with Christmas, and they are certainly not campaigning to see Christmas canceled, renamed, rearranged, or refitted to any other cultural norms. This particular fear comes from the anti-immigration people. You want to talk about spoiling the holidays? Maybe stop co-opting your own so-called holy day for politically based bigotry. Remember, most of our society still recognizes Sundays as days of rest. That’s a very Christian thing, you know. Think of that next time you go shopping on a Sunday.

 
These are examples of the ugliness that tends to seep out into conversation and social media pontificating around this time of year. Sure, everyone has the right to their own opinions, and free speech is still important. In fact, it’s so important, I intend to wish everyone “Happy Holidays” as often as possible. Is it to be that guy who deliberately wants to ruffle feathers? Maybe. Mostly, though, it’s the “happy” part I want to express. 

I spoke earlier about the cost versus the benefit; I feel immense happiness with my fiancée, my children, and my extended family throughout the holiday season, that, in those moments, all the worries and stresses disappear for a few days. I feel rejuvenated, ready to face the new year with my priorities straightened and my focus sharp. And I wish only for everyone to feel the same.

I hope everyone who has lost a loved one and is going through the first, second, or fiftieth Christmas without them finds peace and solace.

I hope everyone who has children revels in the joy they bring as they delight in opening their presents—whether they were hand-made, bought off Amazon, or from Value Village.

I hope everyone who is working away from home is able to talk to their families on the phone, or over Zoom, or read a Christmas card or letter, and that they feel some kind of connection, if only for a little while. And if they’re traveling, that the roads are clear, their coffee is hot, and they arrive at their destinations safe and sound.

I hope those from non-Christian faiths find peace while they watch the majority around them celebrate traditions that are foreign to them, even if they willingly came to Canada and choose to stay here. And I hope they understand how near-sighted some Christians can be.

I hope those who do not observe any religion find the same amount of comfort and rest that the holiday season offers. Whether you believe in anything spiritual or not makes you no less of a human being.

And I hope those who get so wound up over the non-existent “War on Christmas” realize that, while they are heaping undue and unhealthy stress on virtually everyone else, they find some basic understanding of humanity over the holiday season. I wish them the same goodwill I offer to everyone when I say “Happy Holidays”. Because I want them to be happy, too. I didn’t have to go to church to understand that.